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Red Peliboone

Red Peliboone

Don't be fooled by the ballet shoes. Peliboones dislike dancing, classical music and all forms of theatre. They would rather play board games and cards whilst eating chocolate covered peanuts. The shoes are actually used to enable stealthy hunting as the Peliboone likes to sneak up on its dinner unannounced. Someone should tell them that choccy nut snacks can't hear them anyway. Since 1905 they have been banned from flying but will occasionally take to the skies on a Wednesday in March if it's raining. No one knows why but if you catch one you could ask them for me.

Night Creatures

This is a new range of cards for children

Night Creatures

Each of the 6 (and there will be more) has its own personality and talent - the first one is Orange Tangeroone (although he is a bit more red) and he is...The life and soul of any suburban late night garden party. Or so he thinks. The Tangaroone is the friend you'r not really sure you want to be friends with. Don't be filled by the yellow party hat - its actually part of his head. They attend so many parties and events that Mother Nature decided it would be better for the environment just to make them that way. Turn your music off by 9pm to avoid an army of these creatures gate crashing your garden in search of fun - and snacks. Lots of snacks!

Mastiff Attack

Mastiff Attack

Mastiff Attack were formed by DJ Doggy G and rapper 3 Dogs after a successful spell arranging kennel parties in the Bristol area. Their most commercial album was 'Muzzeline' which featured the smash hit single, 'Fleadrop' with Liz from the 'Canine Twins' on lead vocals. Not to be confused with the tabloid newspaper headlines of the same name.

Yellow Guaroone

Yellow Guaroone

The awful tuneless singing and ham-fisted guitar playing make the Guaroone one of the most unwelcome of garden night creatures. On the plus side they leave no mess and, unlike some, take all their specialist picnicking and barbecuing equipment with them in the morning. Although easily domesticated and assimilated into family life, at over 9ft tall, 23 stone and prone to telling the same story over and over and over again, they can test even the most patient Guaroone fancier if acquired as a pet. Proceed with caution. 

Sir Cliff Bitchard

Sir Cliff Bitchard

Sir Cliff Bitchard was influenced by Elvis Pedigree and dominated the Bristish dog music scene in the 1960's. Bitchard's singles including 'We don't Walkies anymore', 'Devil Dog Woman' and 'Mistletoe and Whine' helped make him the third best selling dog in the history of the canine music charts. In the 1970's he fronted his own television show, 'It's Cliff Bitchard' and went on to be the first dog recording artist to be knighted, becoming Sir Cliff Bitchard in 1995. From mid November you'll be able to buy Sir Cliff Bitchard and others from Paperchase. Until then, you can get them from my Etsy shop....

The Sex Poodles

The Sex Poodles

The Sex Poodles first album 'Never Lick The Bollocks' caused outrage when it was first released in 1977, ushering in the Punk Dog era. Led by Sid Vicious-Dog and Johnny Rottweiler, The Sex Poodles hit singles, 'Dog saves the Queen, 'Doggy Vacant' and 'Catteries for the UK' were instant classics. Vicious-Dog died in 1979 after overdosing on training treats.

I was born in Oxford and now live in South London with my husband and three children. I worked for many years as a fashion stylist, and even when I was doing that all I really wanted to do was draw.....

Comments

PManCat

PManCat

01. August, 2014 |

We're getting a cocker spaniel tomorrow that we are going to call Jarvis :-)

Antony Medley

Antony Medley

17. January, 2012 |

I'll grow one if you get rid of yours first.

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